I forgot how funny "Nutty Professor II: The Klumps" was. OMG!!! I've laughed myself silly tonight. #AMC

Remember Janet in "Why Did I Get Married, Too?" She scared me in that scene where she lost it. But I digress. Back to The Klumps!

Janet knows how to cry in movies. She ALMOST made ME shed a tear but that would be a #ManLawViolation

Lord today. I'm watching Janet Jackson in the "Nutty Professor II" on my new 50-in LCD HDTV... #Priceless

#NW - "Nutty Professor II: The Klumps" starring Janet Jackson on #AMC.

Awwww, the baby is SO cute!!!! #ToriAndDean #Oxygen

"The more I give to thee, the more I have." - Dean to Tori #Oxygen #ToriAndDean

Awww, that's so sweet. They're renewing their vows after 4 years. #Oxygen #ToriAndDean

Watching "Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood" on #Oxygen. The Jamaican housekeeper called their baby goat, "Curry Goat" & the goat screamed.

is singing, "I'm redeemed by love divine. Oh glory, glory, Christ is mine. All to Him I now resign. I have been redeemed."

Conrad Murray gets maximum sentence after a "tongue-lashing" by Judge Michael E. Pastor in Michael Jackson case.

A slice of homemade (from Savannah, GA) Butter Pound Cake, slightly warmed with a scoop of Haagen-Dazs Vanilla Ice Cream. #shondo

Last night I dreamed someone hacked my Google+, Facebook, Tumblr & Twitter accounts. Time to change the passwords.

WHAT SAY YOU? Ladies, if you were a "jump-off" for 13 years, would you still be getting evicted? Let me hear from you. Let's go!

Nah, I don't believe THIS lady was Uncle Herman's jump-off. She's been evicted several times including this month. That's not how IT goes.

The holiday weekend is OVER. Uncle Herman is accused of having a jump-off. Another coach is accused of being a pedophile.Welcome back folks!

As soon as you realize your greatness, some will begin to call you arrogant, conceited and prideful.

The realization of greatness begins when you get a revelation of who you were created to be.

Before you were born, greatness was embedded in your DNA.

Sweetie, Sweetie, Sweetie #SMH #RHOA

I'm convinced many of the young artists just DON'T have IT like Earth, Wind & Fire and others. #SoulTrainAwards

Earth, Wind & Fire!!!!! #SoulTrainAwards

Uncle Lee John come here!!!!!

Willie Earl!!!!!!!!!!!!

Its feels GOOD to give God praise!

You need to STOP, take a moment and tell God, "Thank you for keeping me in the midst of it all!" #Praise

Wondering if you're blessed? Look for your fruit.

The heat and pressure may be on you but GOD will keep you in the midst of it all!!!!!!

If you knew the stuff God KEPT FROM YOU, you'd stop complaining about what you're going through NOW.

What YOU went through has taken others out of here, but God KEPT YOU in the midst of it all.

You ever wanted to do something you KNOW was wrong but God KEPT YOU from it? He will keep you in the midst of it all!

The Lord will keep you in the midst of it ALL. He'll keep you when you don't want to be kept!!!! #Praise

Who's watching Episode 2 of "For Better or Worse?" #ForBetter

CATFIGHT!!!!!! #ForBetter

#NW- "For Better or Worse" on #TBS #ForBetter

I think he's gonna purchase TBS and make it TPS within the next 2 years. Oprah's got hers. He will have his.

I AM an American.

How old IS Cicely Tyson? Is she 197 years old. You know she WAS in "Roots" with Kunta Kinte.

One Word: LEFTOVERS Let's go!!!!!!

Which National retailer has BOARD GAMES on sale today? Thanks in advance for the info. Let's go! #BlackFriday

Tamar is TOOMUCH.COM. I've had enough of her for one night. SMH

"I'm gonna slap the PISS out of you!" - Momma Braxton to Tamar. #BraxtonFamilyValues

I'm so full, I need somebody to bring me some Starbucks. Wait, the doors are locked and I'm too full to get up and open the door. #SMH

I'm so full, even though I'm thirsty, I don't want to get up to get something to drink.

I'm so full, I couldn't stand up and had to roll off the sofa.

"It's probably illegal to be THIS hot." - Tamar #BraxtonFamilyValues

I'm so full I was walking like a State Mother when I got up to go to another room.

No Tamar, you DON'T have perfect pitch.com. #BraxtonFamilyValues

Alright folks...my T-Mobile G2X screen has "faded" and I can't see anything OR answer calls. I JUST got the screen replaced. UGH!

That Tamar is VeryMouthy.com UGH! #BraxtonFamilyValues

#NW - "Braxton Family Values" This is the episode when their Father finally showed up to see them after he missed the 1st visit.

Happy Thanksgiving to Robert Earl, Willie Earl, Lee John, Bessie Mae, Eula Ree!!!!!! WILLIE EARL!!!!!!!!!!

Special Shout out to those having their 1st Thanksgiving without that loved one. May the Consolator be your portion.

Lord, the Pastor and his son-in-law were going at it hard on @JudgeGregMathis today. Lord, help the saints.

Robert Earl! Lee Earl! Willie Earl!!!!! Lee John! All families have at least one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Willie Earl!!!!! Every family has a Willie Earl!!!!!!!!! #JumpingTheBroom

#NW - "Jumping The Broom"

Lord, if I could tweet what I just saw, it would take you OUT OF HERE!!!!!!! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Shout out to ALL the people that are JUST going grocery shopping for tomorrow's dinner. Relax. Relate. Release.

Be sure to vote for FLORIDA'S Melanie Amaro right NOW! 1-855-843-9303 please RT #XFactorUSA @ItsMelanieAmaro

I BELIEVE Chris Rene needs to go home. #XFactorUsa

WOW!!!!!!! Melanie Amaro nailed it! XFactor is OVER!!!!!!! @Xfactorusa #Xfactor @HenryFernandez #OhSnap @ItsMelanieAmaro

Let's go Melanie Amaro!!! @XFactorUSA #XFactor @HenryFernandez #OhSnap

is it a prerequisite that all cable/satellite installers be at least 2 hours late?

Well, there you go. They AREN'T getting married. #CarryOn

Some habits are learned. Some habits are in your bloodline. Either way, if your habits are detrimental & counterproductive BREAK IT!

The GREAT thing is, "Jesus IS a HABIT-BREAKER!" - Bishop G.E. Patterson You no longer have to live in vicious generational cycles.

If you saw your mom fussing at & nagging a man, your habitual nature will find you repeating the behavior. "You're just like your momma."

If you didn't see a man treat a woman properly then the habitual nature of a man tends to mistreat women...usually unintentionally.

Some women stay in abusive relationships because that's all they know. Grandma & Mom were abused and stayed and they told YOU to stay.

We are naturally creatures of habit so we tend to repeat cycles in our lives even if they're negative. i.e. - "You're just like your momma."

Every relationship is unique like a fingerprint. Stop trying to clone you're previous relationship in your current relationship.

Shout out to the Choir President that gave the preacher a whole homemade Sweet Potato Pie. Slice #2 coming up!

"You're just like your momma. You're just like your daddy." The child becomes an adult & imitates what he learned as a child in the home.

You can't act a fool inside the home and expect your kids not to play the part of a fool outside the home.

As parents we GREATLY influence behavior OUTSIDE the home by what we demonstrate INSIDE the home daily.

Most behavior perpetuated OUTSIDE the home is demonstrated INSIDE the home first.

You can't have a home with NO structure and expect your kids to have discipline outside of the home.

Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream. That's all I have to say about that.

Lord today!!! What a day. Tomorrow will be even better. Wait, I still a little bit left in today to maximize. Let's go!

STILL at the church. The funny thing is I was leaving at 12 Noon. It's 3:00 PM. Love the saints. Love God more.

STILL at the church. The funny thing is I was leaving at 12 Noon. It's 3:00 PM. Love the saints. Love God more.

At the church house. Love the Saints. Love God more!

As I get ready to close, each one of us should assess our involvement in the political process and vow to ourselves to do better.

Stop listening solely to the talking heads on #CNN, #MSNBC, #FOXNEWS and conspiracy theories. Study & investigate for yourself.

Just like your religious belief, with the U.S. Constitution, you've got to KNOW it to LOVE it and LOVE it to LIVE it.

The U.S. Constitution is not just for lawyers & politicians. It's a living document for Americans that is commensurate your Bible or Koran.

You can't UPHOLD & DEFEND the U.S. Constitution of you've never READ the U.S. Constitution. Its sad most Americans haven't.

We as Americans citizens must use OUR political power & process to form "a more perfect union" as stated in our Constitution.

Because of the media & celebrity of many Congressional Representatives, we forget THEY work for US. If they don't perform, FIRE THEM!

With all due respect, I question the power of the Occupy Wall Street movement. WE have the opportunity to change law every time we vote.

Most congressional representatives have put partisan politics & personal preference before priority and purpose. That's unconstitutional.

If your Congressional representatives' votes are not voting in the best interests of your district then they should not be re-elected.

The legislative branch is elected to serve the will of the people instead of the will of their particular party. #Congress

ANOTHER balanced budget amendment vote failed in Congress today. Has #Congress passed ANYTHING in this session?

If you think Jesus is a Mexican named Oscar Ramiro Ortega-Hernandez, you NEED Jesus!!!!!!!!

Now I wanna watch "The Matrix" on Netflix. SMH

The alleged White House shooter says he's the MODERN Jesus. He must be reading from the MBE. (Matrix Bible Edition) Where's Neo & Morpheus?

According to the alleged White House shooter, he's the MODERN JESUS. So is there an ANCIENT JESUS and a FUTURISTIC JESUS? O_0

The alleged White House shooter (Oscar Ramiro Ortega-Hernandez) says he's the MODERN Jesus. I didn't know Jesus was..............nevermind

Then the alleged White House shooter tried to look like Jesus. Umm, sir I'm SURE Jesus' lamb's wool was ALWAYS tight.

Why couldn't the alleged White House Shooter say he was Mohammed or Buddha? No, he had to embarrass my Jesus by saying he's Christ.#EpicFail

I wonder if God told the alleged White House shooter that he will NEVER EVER EVER EVER see the light of day on this side of hell again?

So the alleged White House shooter says, "I was sent here from God to lead the world to Zion." He says HE'S the Messiah.

That's the news AS I SEE IT folks. Have a great day! Let's go!!!!!

SPORTS NEWS: The NBA STILL sucks. Mike Tyson is making fun of Uncle Herman. Tiger needs to slap his ex-caddie like his his wife slapped him.

POLITICAL NEWS: Uncle Herman is still running for POTUS. The Professor Newt is rising in the polls. And Rick just remember his answer.

As many GROWN men & women as there are in the world to EASILY have sex with, why do people target children?! Something is WRONG!!!!!!!

In the news: A boy says a camp counselor at The Citadel invited him in his cabin to watch porn and they masturbated together. #SMH #iCant

Reports are that a bullet hit a White House window. What, was the Secret Service on lunch break? Have they cut their hours? Huh? Really?!

IN THE NEWS: The paternity suit against Justin Bieber has been dropped. (HUGE SURPRISE) Now he needs to drop a defamation lawsuit on HER.

Welp, nobody is saying anything. So I guess I will narrate the news today. Let's go!

Alright folks, I've been immersed in a project I'm working on this morning. What's going on in the world? Humor me. Let's go!!!!!

is still singing, "You'll never understand my praise. Don't try to figure it out. Because my worship is for real."

And another thing, Uncle Herman, you MIGHT want to study up on a subject before you bash the President on the aforementioned subject. #FYI

#JerrySandusky Its NOT normal to want to shower w/ children. My son is 15yo. That's MY child and I won't EVER shower with him. #SMH

I've got alot on my mind this morning. Alot on my mind.

BREAKING NEWS: Kat Von D says Jesse James (Sandra Bullock's ex) cheated on her. BIG surprise. If he cheated WITH you, he'll cheat ON you.

You can believe that #JerrySandusky is kin folks to the devil. He really believes he's gonna beat this case.

is singing, "There will be no Christmas with the NBA" in the Key of Bb. #NBALockout

This #NBALockout is haggard. It's taking Christmas away from Hustle Man and ALL his children.

Think about the little people affected by the #NBALockout. Arena workers; ticket-scalpers; parking attendants; & the bootleg merchandisers.

Ok, we need to start an OCCUPY NBA or an NBA Prayer Movement. This lockout is NOT of God. #NBALockout

WHAT SAY YOU? If someone feels the need to tell you they're humble, are they? Let's talk.

FREE SWEETIE PLEASE!!!!!! #RHOA #thatisall

#NAPTIME Let's go!

What an incredible time at church today. The dinner with my two buddies was great too. Can you guess what time it is now?

RANDOM THOUGHT: Missing my friend Quantrelle alot lately. UGH!

A SPECIAL Shout Out to the people that join Facebook & Twitter JUST to see what YOU are doing. We see YOU! #CyberStalker

WAIT.....you CANNOT use UrbanDictionary.com to play Words With Friends. #Cheating

If reading isn't fundamental for you, stay away from WORD games. Play games like Angry Birds or Tetris.

Words With Friends anyone? 'RobCarpenter2' ATTENTION: If you cannot talk or spell, you are NOT allowed to play this game. #ThatIsAll

Today, I'm praying for YOUR supernatural strength. God is able and so are YOU. Let's go!

WHAT SAY YOU? What social network do you access the most? Gooooo! (My answer is #Twitter)

This Penn St. Scandal is getting uglier and nastier by the minute. God help us!!!! #PSUCharges

NEW RULE: If you're suspicious of an adult/child relationship, REPORT it & PROTECT the child instead of worrying about offending the adult.

I just read the 23-pg Grand Jury indictment of Jerry Sandusky. Alot of people had to think or know something. #VeryClear #PSUCharges

Ladies & gentlemen 'CONVERSATE' is NOT a word. #ThatIsAll

Nobody told me I would experience a range of emotions while watching, "Love & Other Drugs." #WasntPrepared

#NW- "Love & Other Drugs"

I just got a friend request on My________. Like really?! I can't even remember my password. Do you remember your's? lol

DESSERT: Homemade Red Velvet Cake (slightly warmed) w/ Ben & Jerry's Red Velvet Cake Ice Cream. #Winning

Phase 1 of OPERATION PURGE CONTACTS is done. Phase 2 begins tomorrow. Let's go! #Freedom

Dinner: Fresh Broiled Salmon, Steamed Brussels Sprouts & Fresh Yellow Corn #Yummy

TIP: If your phone assigns ringtones to contacts individually, select 'silent' as the ringtone specific to those less desirous contacts.

HERE'S A TIP: Put "DO NOT ANSWER" as the 1st name & their 1st name as their last name so you know NOT to answer them.

In other news: I'm about to "purge" my contact lists. Who's gonna join me in today's exercise? Let's go!

If I catch 2 ADULTS in the shower, I'm freaking out. And, if I see an ADULT with a CHILD I'm calling the police AND beating them down.

Ladies & gentlemen, a GROWN man should not be taking a shower with a child. And, if you see THAT, assume the worse and report it!

Westboro Baptist Church says that PSU has "taken the playbook of the Catholics" and will protest Saturday. #PSUCharges @DailyCollegian

Wait a second. Back up. Beep. Beep. The Penn St. students were rioting over the firing & NOT the crimes committed? #EpicFAIL #PSUCharges

TODAY'S ASSIGNMENT: Go through your contacts and identify the parasitic people in your life. #ThatIsAll Let's go!

Parasitic people, at the root, aren't very happy and their desire is to make YOU unhappy.

Parasitic people will poison potential, purpose & possibility.

You can't get mad at a parasite for doing what a parasite does. You must take responsibility for allowing the parasite in your life.

Jesus said, "The thief comes ONLY to kill, steal, & destroy..." (Jn 10:10a) Sounds like a parasite.

If you're feeling depleted and drained, check YOURSELF. You may be a host to parasitic people in your life.

Parasites will eat the essence of life out of you and then move on to another host and do the same thing. (Thanks LNA)

Be careful! Some people are a parasite to YOUR happiness. Let them go NOW!

Parasite -a person who receives support, advantage, or the like, from another or others without giving any useful or proper return

#2dayImPraying4.......The Victims & Families in the Penn St. abuse scandal.......Also the Penn St. Players! PLS RT/REPOST! #PSUCharges

Some people will lie when the truth will do. #SMH

I could never understand why people riot and tear up their OWN property. After you calm down, then what? There is another way. #PSUCharges

This Penn State story makes my stomach sick...and this is only the beginning of the story. More sickening details coming. #SMH

I called her on the office line and told her I'm still on hold on her iPhone. Haaaaa!!!!! 19 min 43 seconds.

No she just got off the other call but doesn't realize I'm still on the line and is having a conversation with someone in the office. @Nosey

So my mother just put me on hold and obviously forgot I'm on the other line. 13 min and counting. lol

A Message to His Holy Highness the Worshipful Bishop Rev. Dr. Apostle Grand Poobah

A Message to His Holy Highness the Worshipful Bishop Rev. Dr. Apostle Grand Poobah

One of @HeavyD 's final interviews on hip hop, working w/ Jay-Z, producing & tou.. http://ping.fm/shUJx

One of @HeavyD 's last tweets: All glory comes from daring to begin. <=== Wow!!!!!

@HeavyD 's final tweet: BE INSPIRED!

Tweeted by @HeavyD last night: SMOKIN JOE FRAZIER..RIP.. truly one of the best heavyweight champs that ever lived..GODS SPEED,MR FRAZIER!

BREAKING NEWS: Rapper Heavy D is dead. http://ping.fm/k7XRJ

Haaa! Uncle Herman said, "In closing...." Yep, he's a Baptist preacher. Notice how he's using this opportunity to push his agenda. #Smart

You gotta give Uncle Herman credit, he's NOT backing down. He's standing firm right in the face of opposition.

Stay tuned. I'm watching the LIVE presser w/ Uncle Herman. I wonder if he has his 5 rocks with him?

Shout out to all the men that settled sexual harassment lawsuits a long time ago so they could run for president....of Usher Board #1.

I think if Uncle Herman wasn't an ordained minister, he'd cuss ALL of y'all out during this press conference, and then go back to smiling.

Alright folks I just had my 1st iced coffee ever.. A Venti Mocha Frappaccino w/ Soy milk from @Starbucks I LOVE it!!!!

"That's what SHE said."

Herman Cain used to remind me of a rich uncle that's always smiling. Now he reminds me of that one relative that's always in trouble.

In the Bible, Cain killed Abel. Well, it looks like Abel is about to get his revenge on Cain.

Politics are worse than a woman from Detroit. They'll cut you quick.

These women are coming forward on Uncle Herman like he opened the doors of the church. "Will there be another?"

I can tell by the numerous messages I've received today I tapped into a very serious issue. I got more "thank-you's" than "hate you's."

Thank God for those who have stepped-in/filled-in as a parental figure for that child who was kept away from his other parent.

Truth be told, there are multiplied thousands of hurting fathers AND children because of this type of negative behavior. Get it RIGHT!

As I get ready to close, I wasn't aiming at anybody, but If I hit you I declare I didn't mean to miss you. Get it right TODAY!

If the child has to search online to find the parent and the parent has to search online to find the child, SOMETHING & SOMEONE is wrong.

Any parent that moves, forwarding the address for child support but not a phone number for the parent to call the child is EVIL.

Any parent that tells a child to BLOCK the other parent on Facebook/Twitter so the parent can't interact with the child is EVIL.

No matter what you two did to each other, a boy needs his father & a girl needs her daddy. Anyone that tells you different is a liar.

Men, if you'r being kept from your child(ren) document EVERYTHING for the courts AND for the child. Your day of redemption will come.

Men, if you're supporting your child(ren) financially but aren't allowed to have a relationship with them, GO TO COURT TODAY!

Ladies, there is absolutely NO reason to keep a man from seeing his child other than a court order. Your bitterness doesn't count.

Who saw "Tower Heist" w/ Eddie Murphy, Ben Stiller & Precious? (I know) I LOVED it. Thumbs up here!!!!!

Why didn't anyone remind me the season of the "show I love to hate" began tonight? Update? #TheRealHousewivesOfAtlanta

I'm tired but I've got a praise to unleash today. Let's go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good morning. This is a Waffle House morning. I'll see if I can make it there before church. Let's go!

I'm cracking up watching Chris Tucker & Jackie Chan in "Rush Hour 2" on my flight back to Tampa.

I ALMOST missed my flight sitting in the airport restaurant eating some Carolina BBQ. Lol

My pickup is an hour away. Im about to shut Charlotte-Douglas Intl Airport down. Skype me! 'pastorcarpenter'

I enjoyed my daughter tonight in Atlanta during my layover. Time to catch this connecting flight. Let's go!!!!

Ahhh, the unusual sights & sounds of Hartsfield-Jackson Int'l Airport. Let's go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Malcolm Jamal Warner and Tracey Ellis Ross just strolled past me at Hartsfield going through security.

This Coca-Cola is hitting the spot right now. And THAT'S from a Pepsi man.

Its not the age of a person but rather the wisdom within the person that matters.

Well, I shattered another smartphone screen this morning. It fell off the coffee table on the tile floor. #EmergencyRepair #SMH

When you have it all together, SHOW me, then TELL me. I'll be more likely to receive from you and believe in you.

Some subjects you just sit there, be quiet and don't say a God-blessed word. #ZipIt

If WE were such experts on relationships, so many of US wouldn't be single. #BOOM

"When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you." - Fred Sanford on "Sanford & Son"

If you're still bitter & hurting from your past relationship(s), you can't give advice right now. Get somewhere and sit down.

A man or woman unhealed from a past relationship can't help you mend YOUR current relationship.

You try and give some people the benefit of the doubt and they STILL act like an idiot. Jeeeeesh!

"We must enjoy our lifetime moments in order to experience moments of a lifetime."

#NW - "The Dilemma"

is singing, "How can we be lovers if we can`t be friends? How can we start over when the fighting never ends, baby?" #NoSubtweet

Someone just asked: "If you had to be sequestered for a week, what 3 things would you take?" ME: Tablet, Laptop & toiletries And you?

You've heard what @eharmony says. WHAT SAY YOU? Can you be friends with your Ex? Let's talk! GO!

"Why You CAN'T Be Friends With Your Ex" by @eharmony #4- The Bottom Line

"Why You CAN'T Be Friends With Your Ex" by @eharmony #3- They're moving on but you're not

"Why You CAN'T Be Friends With Your Ex" by @eharmony #2- The Mixed Messages

"Why You CAN'T Be Friends With Your Ex" by @eharmony #1- The Romantic Connection

Ladies & gentlemen, time changes this weekend. FALL BACK (which means an extra hour of sleep Sunday morning.)

A new trend is emerging. If the ladies break their confidentiality agreement, like the ATL guys did, more people will tell their story.

NEW RULE: If you have a scandal in your past, whether true or not, please DON'T reconsider running for President of the United States.

God remembers your vow. Do you?

Thanks for the prayers for my family and I after the passing of my grandmother. The Homegoing will be this Saturday in South Carolina.